We judge people often, even before wanting to get to know them. Just as everything is never as it seems, nobody is really as they come across at first sight. Perhaps, the eye of the beholder is the one at fault, in this case, mine. Seldom do people or even I for that matter, stop to think for a second that there may be lot of emotions behind that facade that people bear; emotions of varying nuances. That first opinion about someone stops us from making the effort, to even engage in a simple conversation or even exchange a mere greeting. This is probably why I missed out on getting to know a few people better, in the past one month.
The first day I walked in to that seminar hall, I looked around for someone approachable, but I found none. I never thought I'd feel out of place in a crowd of complete strangers since making conversation isn't too hard for me, but that day, it indeed was. I picked up my phone just to talk to mum who had just dropped me off hoping I'd feel a little better. It did help for a bit, but I still felt gazes being shot at my direction, as if I was in the wrong place. That was probably the first time I thought, maybe I don't merge in that easily.. It isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it just unsettles me for a bit. I looked around to see a bunch of people and without realizing, in the next couple of hours I had opinions about quite a few of them, which when I look back are completely opposing of what I had inferred then.
Some people completely change the course of your life, moving you with sometimes, the smallest things they say or certain incidents that take you back to the start of the thinking chain. I can say most definitely that some things have compelled me to look into things that probably come across as pretty big-headed, which wasn't meant to be that way. Rectifications can only be made when acceptance of the issue creeps in, but that's not the point right now.. I have found some amazing people in those who I didn't even try making conversation with, initially. People don't have to appeal to you the second you see them, but I don't think judgments should be made instantly without even knowing them well enough to have opinionated views.
This was probably the first time ever, that it took me barely a month to have gotten so attached to certain people that it is hard to still believe that they're all gone; gone to different places in the country to work, gone to begin a new life for themselves, gone to outshine everybody else. It isn't easy to melt the pride of the 'lioness', but it has melted me, in the adoration of the ones, that made a difference in their own little way. I probably can never look back and regret any bit of the time spent with them nor can I let go off all the wonderful times we've had, though they were pretty short-lived but, I sure can regret not getting to know them a little before I actually did. I can't thank you guys enough for all that you guys have done. I probably have had lovely times like these after years now. I still remember the train leaving...
But, believe me on this, all of you have moved me in a way uncomprehending to the bland eye.
Thank you for all the wonderful times and memories.
I love you all!